La Gira del Vago

Eurospurt’s TV coverage of La Giro de la Incertidumbre. Try and imagine the visuals ok? This is just a blog after all…

Alan: Welcome to La Gira del Vago more accurately known as La Gira de la Incertidumbre and you join us at the penultimate stage of the race. It’s all strung out. There are some long lazy hairpins and my goodness aren’t they taking these at speed..!

Bill: For sure Alan…the charge is on. Oh… about eight riders up the road. The rest are trying to wind them in. There’s three Sky riders….er… if Wiggins isn’t there… he should be.

Alan: There’s a Lampre rider. There are more riders who will want to come up to this front group. They are working well on the front, these cyclists. They will be preparing for the sprint.

They are on a charge!  We’re going to a small commercial break.

(Short, merciful release)

Alan: And welcome back to La Gira del Vago….

Katushka are also playing a game today. Dan Martin is the race leader – we haven’t seen him but we assume he’s there somewhere…. so long as he hasn’t punctured.

Ah…there are some Astana riders. Now there’s more teams coming towards the front and pushing on.

Bill: You’ll find Alan, that there are a whole lot more riders trying to bring the leaders back. Some cyclists are skirting around the outside. There are the chasers! They have a 13 second gap!

Alan: This could be some ride if Dan Martin is still in there. He’d be very happy to be there in the lead group. If he’s in the breakaway it’ll give him a huge confidence boost.

Bill: Oh yes. It’s purely down to four Cannondale riders and one Astana rider now.  This is what will happen now, they will want to bring up other sprinters…

Alan: The riders are still rolling… doing a good job. The gap is coming down to only 8 seconds between the leaders and the others behind them.  Are they going to sit and play cat and mouse? Or are they going to bring this race right into town?

Bill: Only time will tell now. If the group gets together maybe we’ll see the race leader. We assume he’s there. Let’s hope he hasn’t punctured!

Alan: If I may interrupt Bill, we should mention there’s another team riding well. Certainly bodes well for those guys with one and a half kilometres to go…   There’ll be roundabouts and a nasty right-hander before the finish. Some of the leading riders might be in the group. I’m not sure whether the top five from yesterday are there.

Bill: It’s all to play for Alan. There are lots of roundabouts coming up. It’s going to be tricky. Oh! I recognised a rider back there. No, wait… Just 1.7k to go.

Alan: And here are the men not to be under-estimated!   Oohhh! The time we were given is wrong. That’s the finish line! I do apologise viewers.

YES! One cyclist won and the others are sprinting… there are lots out here. They are spread thinly now. Here’s a brown and white rider but no, he’s missed the sprint.  And on the day it goes to Orica GreenEDGE!

(30 second pause. Waits for official result to be posted)

Simon Gerrans yes!   Well I didn’t want to call it as I wasn’t absolutely sure…..  Goodness me. All the drama at the end, Bill. Breathtaking stuff.

——————

Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

They can’t help it if they haven’t got any footage from motorbike cameras, I suppose.

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About janh1

Part-time hedonist.
This entry was posted in Countryside, Current Affairs, Cycling, Ridiculous Tosh and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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